From left, Tracy McCray, Jen Koski, and Joy Larson
Back by popular demand: The Chat in which we talk about
visible panty lines, thongs and butt sweat. Really.
visible panty lines, thongs and butt sweat. Really.
JEN: I've been hearing a lot about VPL lately—so I had to look it up.
TRACY: Me too! “Thanks Google!”
JEN: I didn't know what it was. It turns out it’s “visible panty lines.” Who knew?
JOY: I knew, thanks to all the 20-something women in my family.
TRACY: Again... problems our grandmothers didn't have.
JEN: Apparently this is a big concern now.
TRACY: To whom? Who cares if you can see panty lines?
JEN: Word on the street is that even the Mayo dress code takes it seriously.
JOY: As for Mayo, I have my sources. The dress code states that undergarments should not be visible—or, rather, it’s “unacceptable” to have visible undergarments. “Sources” say that this is not referring to the VPL.
JEN: What else could it be referring to? Bras? Undershirts? Jock straps?
JOY: It’s in reference to things like colored underpants under white pants, or bra straps hanging out, or the top of underpants visible between pants and shirt, like when bent over.
TRACY: It used to be that VPL were nothing more than a "fashion DON'T" in Cosmo, now it’s real trouble! Is there a rule that you can't go commando in the business place, or does that just go right into your 'permanent file?'
JEN: Can you imagine getting called into the HR office for THAT? "It has come to our attention that while you do not have a VPL... there's a disturbing reason for that."
TRACY: "Uh, I... I mean WE have noticed...”
JOY: Mayo policy says that undergarments must be worn... but really, does anybody check?
TRACY: I LOVE to think that there is a "VPL Police" out there.
JOY: All men on that squad, I’m sure.
TRACY: Is this because of yoga pants? I mean, I know you can't wear yoga pants in the business workplace, but did the invention of yoga pants make the offense of VPL a bigger deal?
JOY: No, Victoria’s Secret and mass advertising made the VPL a faux pas.
JEN: How can you NOT have VPL in yoga pants?
TRACY: I think the bigger problem would be that pants are tight enough that we can see the VPL. Girls, for the love of Calvin Klein, please stop worrying about the size of your pants and just buy clothes that fit.
JOY: Are we going to discuss the thong?
JEN: Oh sweet baby Jesus, the thong.
TRACY: What about the thong?
JOY: For starters, who invented it? And who ever thought it was a good idea, and what the heck is the function of a thong anyway?
TRACY: Well… it CAN be comfortable if you buy the right kind. I mean somebody told me that!
JOY: Thong alert! Thong alert!
TRACY: The function of the thong is no VPL.
JEN: Oh, there's a VPL—it's just that it's up above the back of your pants.
TRACY: See, that's the uncomfortable kind. …I mean, somebody told me it's the uncomfortable kind.
JEN: There's a comfortable thong?
TRACY: I need to go get a drink of water. Please change the subject by the time I get back.
JEN: Not happening. This is fascinating.
JOY: I refuse to believe that there is a comfortable thong. (Then again, my daughter once said, “I can’t decide what is more disturbing, the fact that my mom actually owns a thong, or that I am borrowing it.”)
JEN: OK, ladies, you realize that every time I see you from now on, I'm going to be checking out your butts.
JOY: Is this really going to be published online?
TRACY: I DO NOT WEAR A THONG! (Every day....)
JEN: I don’t get thongs. I mean, if you're going to wear a thong, you might as well not wear any underwear, right?
JOY: That would be my thought—why wear anything? It doesn’t, um, serve the purpose of regular underpants.
TRACY: Someday my daughter is going to Google my name and THIS will be what she finds! I take it back. Thanks for nothing, Google!
JEN: Wait. What ARE the purpose of regular underpants? I'm looking it up right now. ...There is, of course, a Yahoo! Answers on the topic.
JOY: And Yahoo! says…?
JEN: Yeah, you're going to have to look it up yourself. It turns out it’s borderline inappropriate. (Not that we seem to care about that today.) I'll tell you this: The word "butt sweat" is used.
JOY: Yikes. TMI.
TRACY: For me...it really does depend on the pants I'm wearing AND if I have to do laundry.
JOY: I prefer adequate coverage myself.
TRACY: I need to be done with this Chat. I have to start writing a list of people I need to apologize to...
JEN: Starting with your daughter?
TRACY: Yes.
TRACY: Me too! “Thanks Google!”
JEN: I didn't know what it was. It turns out it’s “visible panty lines.” Who knew?
JOY: I knew, thanks to all the 20-something women in my family.
TRACY: Again... problems our grandmothers didn't have.
JEN: Apparently this is a big concern now.
TRACY: To whom? Who cares if you can see panty lines?
JEN: Word on the street is that even the Mayo dress code takes it seriously.
JOY: As for Mayo, I have my sources. The dress code states that undergarments should not be visible—or, rather, it’s “unacceptable” to have visible undergarments. “Sources” say that this is not referring to the VPL.
JEN: What else could it be referring to? Bras? Undershirts? Jock straps?
JOY: It’s in reference to things like colored underpants under white pants, or bra straps hanging out, or the top of underpants visible between pants and shirt, like when bent over.
TRACY: It used to be that VPL were nothing more than a "fashion DON'T" in Cosmo, now it’s real trouble! Is there a rule that you can't go commando in the business place, or does that just go right into your 'permanent file?'
JEN: Can you imagine getting called into the HR office for THAT? "It has come to our attention that while you do not have a VPL... there's a disturbing reason for that."
TRACY: "Uh, I... I mean WE have noticed...”
JOY: Mayo policy says that undergarments must be worn... but really, does anybody check?
TRACY: I LOVE to think that there is a "VPL Police" out there.
JOY: All men on that squad, I’m sure.
TRACY: Is this because of yoga pants? I mean, I know you can't wear yoga pants in the business workplace, but did the invention of yoga pants make the offense of VPL a bigger deal?
JOY: No, Victoria’s Secret and mass advertising made the VPL a faux pas.
JEN: How can you NOT have VPL in yoga pants?
TRACY: I think the bigger problem would be that pants are tight enough that we can see the VPL. Girls, for the love of Calvin Klein, please stop worrying about the size of your pants and just buy clothes that fit.
JOY: Are we going to discuss the thong?
JEN: Oh sweet baby Jesus, the thong.
TRACY: What about the thong?
JOY: For starters, who invented it? And who ever thought it was a good idea, and what the heck is the function of a thong anyway?
TRACY: Well… it CAN be comfortable if you buy the right kind. I mean somebody told me that!
JOY: Thong alert! Thong alert!
TRACY: The function of the thong is no VPL.
JEN: Oh, there's a VPL—it's just that it's up above the back of your pants.
TRACY: See, that's the uncomfortable kind. …I mean, somebody told me it's the uncomfortable kind.
JEN: There's a comfortable thong?
TRACY: I need to go get a drink of water. Please change the subject by the time I get back.
JEN: Not happening. This is fascinating.
JOY: I refuse to believe that there is a comfortable thong. (Then again, my daughter once said, “I can’t decide what is more disturbing, the fact that my mom actually owns a thong, or that I am borrowing it.”)
JEN: OK, ladies, you realize that every time I see you from now on, I'm going to be checking out your butts.
JOY: Is this really going to be published online?
TRACY: I DO NOT WEAR A THONG! (Every day....)
JEN: I don’t get thongs. I mean, if you're going to wear a thong, you might as well not wear any underwear, right?
JOY: That would be my thought—why wear anything? It doesn’t, um, serve the purpose of regular underpants.
TRACY: Someday my daughter is going to Google my name and THIS will be what she finds! I take it back. Thanks for nothing, Google!
JEN: Wait. What ARE the purpose of regular underpants? I'm looking it up right now. ...There is, of course, a Yahoo! Answers on the topic.
JOY: And Yahoo! says…?
JEN: Yeah, you're going to have to look it up yourself. It turns out it’s borderline inappropriate. (Not that we seem to care about that today.) I'll tell you this: The word "butt sweat" is used.
JOY: Yikes. TMI.
TRACY: For me...it really does depend on the pants I'm wearing AND if I have to do laundry.
JOY: I prefer adequate coverage myself.
TRACY: I need to be done with this Chat. I have to start writing a list of people I need to apologize to...
JEN: Starting with your daughter?
TRACY: Yes.